IN THE BEGINNING, THERE’S ATTRACTION

When their eyes met for the first time, something miraculous happened, just as it has since the first man and woman.

A connection that is almost beyond explanation creates a strong desire to be together.  Poems and songs have been written about it.  Immeasurable are the titles of books dedicated to it.  It is a powerful emotion that is the nucleus of what moves us forward and keeps us grounded.  It is what brings us together and what brings us life.  What is this feeling that attraction invites us to experience?  It is Love.

When two people are destined to be together, and they initially meet each other’s gaze, they recognize something familiar. What is this, which we see in the other that awakens our heart? It is Soul.  Not, “a Soul,” not, “Souls,” just Soul.  Soul dwells in all of us.  We may not consciously recognize it as Soul – we simply feel a bond to that special other.  As a sense of peace, joy, and love fills us with that gaze, we go even deeper into our connection. This is the beginning of what we call Intimacy.

When we feel safe with another, we invite that person into our lives, and our trust grows. Like peeling away the layers of an onion, lifelong defense mechanisms that once protected our false sense of self, begin to fall away, revealing our true nature to the other.  The safer we feel, the deeper we go.  Thus, intimacy (Into Me You See) becomes a vital and even necessary part of a healthy relationship.

This recognition of Soul is evident in thriving relationships.  Some are deeper than others, but if the relationship is to grow and mature, this process of self-discovery is essential.  So, the progression continues.  Attraction generates trust, which leads to openness, and then intimacy, eventually stimulating a stronger bond and personal growth.

This progress is natural in every healthy relationship.  And when all said and done, the result is always a discovery about who we truly are.

Barry Tuchman